Youth and Deception

As you grow up, you do many things that you don't want other people to know about. You may sneak into an R rated movie before you are old enough. You may go over to your girlfriend's house without your parents knowing. Some people even sneak out of their house late at night and take their parents car for a cruise before they even have a license.

As a kid, you think that you will never get caught. What you don't know is that your parents always find out. If you knew then what you know when you become a parent yourself, you probably would not have done these things in the first place.

Lying is a tricky thing when you are growing up. You may not hate your parents, but there are always times when you think they are being unfair because they are not letting you do what you want to do. Because of this, you sometimes stretch the truth or even outright lie so you can get your way. What you don't realize is that your parents are just trying to protect you. What you want to do may not be the best thing for you, but you are too short-sighted when you are young to realize this.

Looking back now, I realize that honesty and discussion is the best way to handle this. If my parents would have encouraged honest conversation and debate, I might be a better communicator today. I am not saying that I did any of the things I talked about in this post. I was a pretty good kid growing up, but my communication style could have been much different today if dialogue was encouraged.

AS I am raising my own kids, I need to keep this in mind. I have a teenage daughter who is probably doing these things as we speak. I have to remind myself to have honest discussions with her and to always encourage her to debate the reasons why she should be able to do things so that she tries to figure out exactly why things are important to her and her communication skills improve.

I often look at kids today and feel that they are very materialistic and have warped priorities. Maybe my parents felt the same way about me when I was growing up. The difference is that I was taught to work hard by my parents. I was able to work in fruit packing houses when I was a teenager. Opportunities like that just do not exist anymore so kids are not able to experience hard work. This makes it more difficult for parents to teach them the value of work and sacrifice.

I really need to do everything in my power to make sure that I am able to teach my kids these lessons. I believe that their future rests on my ability to teach them about society and the world and to encourage their thinking and communicating.